THE 'D' GRADE. (cause it's father's day!!)

First and foremost...
HAPPIEST FATHER’S DAY TO ALL THE FATHERS AND MOTHERS FILLING BOTH SHOES!!!
Now this ‘D’ grade is all about the father’s that actually stuck around and earned themselves the sterling ‘Daddy’ name.
Almost every male human being on earth can be a father but it takes a whole other breed of male humans to make a ‘Daddy’. (Get your minds out of the gutter people! It’s father's day!!)
I have been blessed with the most INVOLVED dad that it gets annoying almost everyday and every hour if he wasn’t busy. Growing up it was really suffocating. But now as an adult I truly APPRECIATE him. I’ve grown up with friends who talk to their fathers out of a sense of ‘duty’. Others because society and culture and religious teachings tell us we should answer when called by an adult and especially your parent. I love my father. No matter how long his calls get..
..i cherish them. Plus he’s really ENTERTAINING!! Hihihi. I get some of my creativity and theatrics from him. I’m not saying we don’t fuss and fight. We do! We are both stubborn, love having things our way and we definitely have very parallel ways of looking at life and living it. But he’s my first love. He made sure I understood that on my bad days he is there. Whether I like it or not. He makes sure during my heart breaks....(i never tell him but he always knows)...he reminds me over and over how beautiful iam and how lucky any man would be to have me. This man right here fights even ME and my stubborn and rebellious self just to keep me close. Why would I settle for less?! I LOVE YOU DAD. No matter what happens I APPRECIATE you.
Now both my parents have helped raised most of my orphaned or abandoned cousins and even non relatives. And they are even more ‘nosy’ (And I mean that in the most affectionate way) with all their adopted children. There’s just this one problem.....the abandoned children they’ve raised have fathers. Now it got to a place the fathers started reaching out and my parents refused to let them into their biological children's lives. I also thought it was to protect my adopted siblings but as an adult and with all the ‘daddy issues’ loitering around I’ve realised my parents might have thought it was for the best but it never was.
Why? Because my adopted siblings are carrying around lethal portions of bitterness and resentment towards their biological parents and even extended relatives at large. Asking “why didn’t you come for us?” “Why didn’t you fight hard enough to get us?” “where have you been?” “what was so important?” And what have you. Which is natural. We all want people who claim to love us or who should love whether they want to or not (our parents) to actually fight for us. As an adult I now understand that our parents shape us into the human beings we are or still becoming and there’s nothing we can do about it. If you have a great dad you want be like him when you grow up and even emulate him in bringing up your children and how you treat women. Then if he’s just a terrible person. He abandoned you. He was there but never provided. Never supported you. You couldn't  even talk to him and he was right there. Or if he was a drunkard or junkie. Or never treated your mother well......all these negatives will make you want to be better than him. Be a better man for yourself, your spouse and even your children. But! Some actually take this as an example and follow in those  negative footsteps. Either way our parents shape us into the human beings we become.
My simple suggestion....don’t hide your children from their biological fathers or mothers and relatives. Don’t be the reason they don’t know their roots. Don’t stand in their way of growth. Let them decide. You can only guide and counsel them. You can’t change their DNA no matter what. So you laid the bed now you got to lie in It!! Respect your children's heritage! Whether their fathers earn the sterling ‘D’ grade or not is up to them!

 Happy father’s day once again to the sterling Dads out there!!!

THEE 'V' MONOLOGUES (part 1).

I'm calling this upcoming series.....thee 'V' monologues' meaning....thee 'VENTING' monologues. A girl has got to vent at some point anyway.

There’s a particular ‘human being’ I was quite unfortunate to encounter in my journey of this life.
This human being has all the makings of a bad egg plant. ‘Eeww’?! I know! Anyways so we were ‘friends’ or rather I ASSUMED so. We got to know each other.....blah blah. The usual customary shenanigans that go with any new friendship. Then out of nowhere she starts creating issues and I’m like ‘whoa!’ what in the world is going on here?! Any usual reaction. Right? And the worst part is I personally was never confronted. Though confronting is usually not an easy feat. But as ‘friends’ that shouldn’t be a problem. I mean...you ‘know’ me. Ehe, so she takes the issue to the public. It gets back to me ofcourse. Then the ‘confrontation’ meet is held finally. And this human being can’t solidly express the issue she's got with me and I lost it. Like seriously, don’t come for me if you ain’t got anything solid to throw my way.

Bottom line is;
 1) MY LIFE doesn’t revolve around You! I actually have a life. I have my beauty sleep to keep up with. I have my hustle I’m working on. I have other relationships to tend to....etc.

2) Herself was never a day she actually came through for me. None. It’s been a year now by the way. And I’ve replayed that short period over and over and yes....heifer. You never came through. Best be sure.

3) I’m so sorry for ever coming across your particular type of ‘heifersm’. Because to be honest I insulted my INTELLECT. I insulted my upbringing. I can now thank my folks for their PERSISTENCE in discipline socially and otherwise.

4) My mistake was my misplaced loyalty. Especially in fighting your battles that never even concerned me. In fact I was never there when you picked them. Should have noticed the glaring fact that you never keep friends. But I wasn’t built to judge. Most unfortunate!
I fight a good fight. Verbally and physically but above all I write best. And you were never worth even the time leave alone the energy.
Moral: No matter what NEVER ever let anyone take you for a joy ride. Life is way too short for joyrides. I’m not talking about relationships. Those are a whole different story. That i’ll get to soon.
Don’t let friendships bring you down simply because they can. Pick your struggles. Pick your fights. You’ve got your gut feeling or your instincts. TRUST them! We all have 999 problems and draining friendships shouldn’t be one.
This particular type of ‘human beings’ will use you then when they're done...they’ll act you did them wrong and leave things messy as they move on to ‘USE’ someone else. It’s never you. It’s them. Let’s learn from our mistakes.

Yours Uncensored.

(stay tuned😈).

THE 'F' WORD

This is for all the people out there that their families or people they thought would be there for them through the worst times of their lives......but I’m all about family today.

Fact is we can’t choose family. That’s determined and chosen the second we are conceived in our mother's wombs. As long as she’s ovulating and responds to her hormones. (Had to get crude). From then henceforth your family is firmly ENGRAVED on STONE. From your parents, siblings to cousins, aunties, uncles, grandparents to the entire clan!! You’re even eternally tied to your ancestors no matter who they were. Such is life.

Now; we all grow up believing and knowing that as long as you got family......you're entitled to certain privileges we ‘assume’ are our rights and that applies to everyone that came way before us.
Privileges like; being loved just as you are.....being supported no matter what....being helped whenever or however....
You can imagine your brain's SHOCK when family isn’t what it used to be. Parents and relatives actually CHOOSE who to support amongst you and your siblings plus cousins and even distant relatives you didn’t even know you had!!  I mean “dad/mom!! Err.....excuse me!! Like I’m right here! Not doing so well.....so like....um....I NEED your HELP too!! Can’t you see that?! I’m worse off here!” And blah blah blah. Your silent cries turn into outbursts or tantrums or you simply shut down.
Family isn't a “privilege” our generation gets to enjoy. And I’m NOT talking about “ALL” families on this planet. But ‘most’ and the numbers are growing alarmingly. Our forefathers were beyond blessed. Nobody gave up on anybody. Especially FAMILY. Aunties, uncles and grandparents would worry about their grandchildren, nieces and nephews. Even from distant relatives and even chip in and OFFER help. In fact they would shove the help in your face whether you wanted/liked or not.

In all honesty human beings will always be human beings. We are a very ‘SPECIAL’ type of species.
We easily take things and people for granted. Even as we lose people around us friend, foe and stranger.....you’d think something would spark off in our brains to straighten atleast just one relationship in our lives and APPRECIATE this gift of life that we've been blessed with and treat each other better. Instead ‘selfishness’ is taking root and spreading like wild fire.
My heart breaks for the potential leaders, record breaking artists, next level type of innovators etc that are currently SLOWLY dying inside because you look worthless to the people around you and especially your family. Wherever you are I hope you get to read this. All hope isn’t lost. As long as you have hope. Hope that tomorrow will be better. The biggest and most fulfilling love of all is you loving yourself first. Accept that nobody's perfect. Accept your imperfections. That’s your identity. They are what make you special. Your own brand of ‘perfect’. Own it. Love it. Use it.
Family is still made up of human beings. At the end of the day everyone in it is busy fighting their own share of battles with the world and within themselves. They’ll talk you down. They’ll act like they know how to help you ‘sort’ you out but mostly give up or lose interest. Listen....accept your weaknesses and strengthen your strengths. Love yourself above all. You will most definitely attract the people you need around you. They themselves won’t understand what drew them to you. It will be LOVE. LOVE for yourself will turn the energy around you into positive energy.
Positive energy attracts human beings to it like a magnet. After all is said and done no man is an island. We all need our fellow humans one way or another.
Don’t let family acting out....acting shady.....or even kicking you out into the streets keep you from loving yourself. Many times we ask ourselves why? Stop it. As long as you’re an adult and not a kid. Work on yourself. Work hard. Love all your family members. Even the ones that let you down or didn’t believe in you and even the ones that refused to help you out outright. Love them from a distance. Let the grudges go. Let go of the bitterness. It’s cultivating into negative energy that you most definitely don’t need. Your family loves you but they're still HUMAN. We all need to realise not everyone is ‘visionary’. Otherwise we would all be very RICH. If we all saw into each other's potential. We would all invest in each other. But, alas! That's definitely not happening with this generation! Sad fact. But....you have yourself! Live! Love! Grow! Eat! Learn! Laugh!