Posts
First and foremost, i am NOT perfect to be very CLEAR; and no one else out there is.
I have had to fight battles very many out there don't need to and some have no idea that such battles even exist to be fought in the first place.
Never once have i not fought them because i chose to take pity on myself.
Or take a hit during the fighting and stayed down to avoid getting back up and fighting some more.
I'm furthest from the strongest man on earth for sure but the fights i'm talking about aren't just physical.
I've had to fight emotional, mental and even spiritual battles.
Most of these battles would give me sleepless nights and even make me jumpy of even a housefly flying around.
My education has taken severe hits from these battles but i never dropped out of school.
I would lose people i would confide in with reasons best known to themselves.
I'm a serious piece of work in progress. That i cannot deny either.
But this particular piece of work is shaping up quite well. Why??
Because i can accept when i have made mistakes.
I can accept when i hurt and even cry nowadays which i could hardly do before.
I don't blame myself when people walk out when im in a dark place and having withdrawal syndrome where it can even jeopardize your relationship when your spouse jumps to the conclusion that your energy and affection is directed elsewhere.
I no longer have to insist on speaking my unfiltered mind just because i have a mouth and a loud voice to speak with.
I can now finally be civilized and cordial to people i don't like or people that aren't treating my family, spouse and even my few friends right. Before it was all personal. You mess with any of my loved and woe unto you. Wether my loved one was on the wrong or not. As long as they are hurting and you are behind it the whole ball game would turn nasty.
Now i know fighting people's battles is at times genuinely unnecessary. Everyone needs to grow from their own mistakes and experiences at some point and shielding them in most cases is just interfering with that.
Plus a whole lot has happened and people who appeared like the coolest and cleanest waters are actually the murkiest. So the saying that claims don't judge a book by its cover is no joke.
I have simply learnt that i can hold my head highest when everyone is expecting my head to fall off.
I have learnt not to give up on my loved ones even if they give up on me. That's their own cross to carry.
Giving up on someone who's made you irrevocably happy at some point in your life because they've made 1 mistake or 2 is a cross you will have to carry when you realize the grass was never greener on the other side.
I don't give up on easily on anyone i love......no matter what. Maybe that's a problem but its a problem i don't regret having because i have someone who has never given up on me no matter what. I have been at my absolute WORST. And that person has never left. My actions might have embarrassed and brought shame or even hurt to that person and that person keeps giving me even better opportunities than the previous ones.
We don't need even two people. We all need that one person that will look us in the eyes and tell us how full of shit we are. The person that chew our heads off when we go astray and even look the other way for a few days but look back at us and reassure us how full of shit we are and even yell our eardrums off some more but later give us a hug or a kiss and be the crutches we need to get back up and make things work.
Yours;
Getty Uncensored.
